SECRET CORNER OF THANATOS

i hesitated for quite some time before deciding to type this post as i fear the community here would not be able to accept this radical remark on what i’m going to say….as i’m surrounded by many emotionally sensitive people who would rather hear praises than the truth…who likes to gossip behind people’s back and who knows, the incident happening in " i know i’m fat" post would repeat itself….

before i start i just wanna make everything clear that i have no intention of hurting anyone…and i’m sorry if i do hurt anyone….but i can’t help it…..

so as usual….the malaysian students in nizhny novgorod will hold the Malaysian NIght every year to welcome new students.all the teachers will be invited, as well as many other foreign students from different country….so it would be an international gathering among the students…as usual….the aim is for the juniors to get familiar with this place and so that the russians and foreigners can get to know more about malaysia…

this means that everything we do will directly potray our culture and reflect our community back home, directly or indirectly…..

as usual the preparation wasn’t easy….jobs were given to cook, decorate the hall, performance, sound system and others…but even when deviding job, before the malaysian night at this stage….there were alot of problems arising….the failure of the committe to work together and lack of cohesion between them resulted in some trouble in deviding job….when the committe member in charge who is usually proud of her post as ajk, miss out alot of names in deviding job…..giving people job that is not equavalent to their capability….putting them into wierd groups, and seperating them from their friends…

that was just the beginning…

when all the preparations were done…everyone was looking forward to this annual event with great anticiaption….as this might be the last time such event involving all malaysians will be held…..for the rest of the academic year la i mean..

the guys dressed up formally, and girls wore their best clothes in the closet…as a sign of respect and anticipation to the coming BIG event of the year….

but overall, i would say the performance was great….thanks to the continuous effort of the juniors who has been preparing since one or 2 months ago….and this year…surprisingly the 5th year student this year took active part in the performance….

but it was kinda spoilt by the MCs….

fyi….MC stands for Master of Ceremony…..well i do not mean to insult your intellegence by telling u that, but obviously the MC that night didn’t know about the meaning of it….they do not realise the importance of their role as the playmaker of the whole Malaysian night…

there are 2 of them, one girl one boy….both my juniors…

first of all, their clothes doesn’t match….u might think this is not important….and i don’t mean to say that when the girl wears cheongsam(which she did)….the guy must wear sam fu….but dun la one wear cheong sam, one wear t shirt and jeans…. 1st of all the guy shows no repect to the ceremony…..imagine…the dean, students and teachers all dressed up formally…..and he pula wear casually…..

then, there’s no interaction between both of the MCs….it’s like they have met each other for the first time that night….they looked on the floor while having dialog…probably reading the script which they wrote seperately without any rehersal…. and no eye contact between each other…

then when we started our ceremony with "Negaraku" ,everyone in the hall, including the vice rector, teachers and other international students were "summoned" to stand up by 2 simple word : " all rise"…..without a please at the back…..and after we sang our national anthem which is obviously not understandable to them, but they stood up anyway as a respect for our "grand" ceremony….the least we could do is to say "thank you"…….but instead, the MC continued with…."next, we’ll moved on to….."

another thing which is really memalukan is when the MC ask for the dean to give a speech…..when the dean was ABSENT……everyone told him that she is not present….even the vice rector spoke up…cause cannot tahan edi…but the MC is still blur…..she should have checked the guest list….at least for those who is giving speeches….if not all……it’s part of the job of an MC…..and well, i have to say the president is kinda responsible for it also….

next, she called for the most important and respected people in the hall that night with a very rude way in russian’s point of view…..she called his family’s name instead of his first name……that’s a very great insult for the russians….. but he gave his speech anyway….but being very rude again, the MC did not thank him for the speech….

but she thanked the student union president( an african guy) after being reminded by the audience…..well, obviously the vice rector would feel insulted…..i could see his face turned black….with a very very very annoyed expression….

and she called upon the malaysian student assoiciation president to give a speech by her nickname…. well, maybe they are close….but in formal occasion, an MC should be more formal and professional…..

all these gave the impression to the russians and other foreigners that Malaysians are rude, uneducated, no manners, and disrespectful for others….which we are in fact not….if u were there u could see the VIPs’ "unbelievable" face…..the russians might think that they thought they are the best in having no regards for other people…..but i think they realised that they are wrong that night….

u see….although we are in fact not as teruk as the MC potray us to be…..but we cant do anything as the only 2 person who speaks in the whole malaysian night are the MCs….and they have a job to show others that we in fact have good manners, well educated…..it’s the only way that we could earn respect from the teachers(russians), to take us seriously…. and learn to become a doctor from them……so that they do not think we are just clowns who comes here to play play play and perform dances and sing during special events….(quoting from my roommate….)

that’s not all….

while one MC is speaking….the other is leaning against the wall…..at least she should realise that while on the stage…both of them are in the limelight….even if only one of them is speaking…the others should stand straight….i mean not like tunggul….but no leaning to the side la….even if the other guy’s speech is boring….

and while introducing the perfromance….we rarely see the mc stand together…either one of them will introdue it…and even if they go on stage together….they would stand far far apart…..so not camera friendly….(i’m saying this cause i was the cameraman)….and while having dialog…..it’s fine if u read from the script u prepared…..but to read wrongly even when having dialog….that one i feel embarassed for her….

then after the MC introduced the following performance…. there’s a long interval before the performance actually started….making the excited atmosphere of the ceremony from the previous performance stopped suddenly….i mean it’s a job of MC to keep the atmosphere high always…and they should act spontanously when there’s some technical problems……not just stand there like it’s non of their business and let the audience wondering what’s happeneing….

oh, and when calling for students to go to back stage and prepare for their performace…she said…:"xxx please go to the back stage now, NOW!!"

and some people complaint that it’s not right not to start the ceremony with bacaan doa…

well i’m not gonna continue criticizing the MC…….as i know her( one of the MC) and i know she’s a nice girl and all…but i do not want to comfort her by saying "it’s ok…it’s your first time…" because it is obviously NOT OK…..even if this is your first time and u are nervous….u should train train and train more…try to overcome your nervousness and fear of the stage….not be overconfident by not rehersing on the day before and after that comfort yourself it’s ok….and giving different excused…

i’m not going to be like the president who tries to comfort herself by telling herself that this ceremony is not screwed up yet…that there’s still some hope of saving it…..

from the first word uttered by the MC…..i’ve already lost all anticipation and passion for the night….i was angry and at the same time shameful for what they are potraying me and all other malaysians….

ok…i’ll move on to the performance…

as i’ve said….there were too long of interval between performances….. and it kind of made the mood of the audiences fluctuate all the time….up and down from the peak of a mountain to the bottom of a groove…..

there were great dances undoubtedly as the juniors has made a great effort to prepare them…..and i have to say some were the best in the history of Malaysian night….

but there are some who sing with broken voice, rap who sounded like shit when nobody understands him, some who sing like an angel but fail totally as a performer because he had no interaction with the audience at all…..no eye contact….just looking at the floor all the time….emotionless….and worrying too much about the lighting, sound system and all…..when he should just focus on performing….

well, i’m not a professional judge or anything….and u might say that i’m not in the place to judge the performance or the MCs…because i should have done it myself if i talk so much….but that’s where u are wrong….audience is often the most strict judge….and they have all the rights to criticize or praise whoever is on the stage….because the job of a performer is to perform FOR the audience….not TORturing their eyes and ears…just to fulfill their strong desire to perform and show off their broken voices….syok sendiri when they should just shut up and spare the audience from the pain in the eyes and ears….

i do respect them for taking so much effort to prepare for the performance…..but please la listen to yourself or look at yourself in the mirror before u present to others….

and that gives a good explaination why i decided not to perform in the malaysian night….and rejected the request of becoming the MC….because if i did….i wouldn’t be able to criticizing here….and i might be the one who everyone criticizes at the back…

one thing i pity about one of the performance is that it was arranged during the break….when everyone is busy eating snacks when the band is perfoming…when nobody listen… it’s such an insult to the perfomer….like playing guitar to a bunch of cows…(no offence to the audience)….but that’s what i would feel if i were the one performing…it’s the management’s fault that this happens….

and malaysian night was supposed to be a night when the seniors get to know more about the juniors and we gt to socialize and interact with each other…as we are staying in different hostel now….and we seldom see each other if there’s no special occasion…but instead of having time to socialize….we were urged to go back to our hostel to get the food that we cooked…

oh one thing worth mentioning is that not all malaysians were present…some would rather study or sleep or do other stuff…..if u are reading this….the "malaysians" i mentioned throughout this post does not include you….so do not be syok sendiri or offended….as u are not regarded as one of them here….

well, i dare not say that i represent the opinion of the whole community here…but i would say at least 10 of them would agree with me….if not more…..just that nobody who dares to speak up for the fear of being boycotted…well, i’m afraid too….but i have to speak up for this "injustice"…so hate me for speaking up the truth…

again, this post is not to hentam anyone….i just wanna express my dissapointment for my high expectation for this long awaited event(i even did some wierd hairstyle…..do not feel pity as i (we) are the real victim here…..

i really hope that i’m not killed by the president, the MC or any of the performer on that night….

the pictures would be updated soon…..lots of them….hahaha…..